The repository contains 64 quotes in the category “Religion.”
Showing quotes 1 through 20 in the category “Religion.” Page 1 2 3 4.
I care not for a man’s religion whose dog or cat are not the better for it.
President Abraham Lincoln
1809 — 1865
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
Woody Allen
1935 —
The only good thing to come out of religion was the music.
George Carlin
1937 — 2008
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
George Carlin
1937 — 2008
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
George Carlin
1937 — 2008
Jesus died for our sins. Dare we make his sacrifice meaningless by not committing them?
George Carlin
1937 — 2008
As far as I’m concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that’s worth believing.
George Carlin
1937 — 2008
When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers.
Oscar Wilde
1854 — 1900
Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I’ll forgive Thy great big one on me.
Robert Frost
1874 — 1963
Even the merest gesture is holy if it is filled with faith.
Franz Kafka
1883 — 1924
A man cannot become an athiest merely by wishing it.
Napoleon Bonaparte
1769 — 1821
Why is it when we talk to God we’re praying, but when God talks to us, we’re schizophrenic?
Lily Tomlin
1939 —
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
Voltaire
1694 — 1778
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
Voltaire
1694 — 1778
Man is certainly stark mad: he cannot make a flea, yet he makes gods by the dozens.
Michel de Montaigne
1533 — 1592
Watching a condemned criminal being led to the execution chamber.:
There but for the grace of God go I.
Rev. George Whitefield
1714 — 1770
Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.
Ambrose Bierce
1842 — 1914?
Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
Ambrose Bierce
1842 — 1914?
Scriptures, n. The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
Ambrose Bierce
1842 — 1914?
You have to just marvel at the stun-gun absurdity of fighting to the death over what happens after you die.
Dennis Miller
1953 —
Showing quotes 1 through 20 in the category “Religion.” Page 1 2 3 4.
